Thursday, May 29, 2008
The Coming Landslide
Theres been a lot of speculation about the supposedly 'swing' states that the glowing, attractive, aisle-crossing, Maverick is poised to pick up because he has so cleverly abandoned that albatross that some Republican candidates are cursed with, Conservatism. The Republican professional consultants who have alighted like corpse-flies on the already-moribund McLame campaign are spinning pretty fantasies about how the spavined horse in whom they have have placed all their pathetic hopes will burst past the finish line ahead of his eloquent, youthful opponent in a landslide! They've produced some pretty compelling charts to prove they're right...almost as compelling as the ones that prove Global Warming is man-made and about to cause a tidal wave that will reach to Indiana. The nice thing about charts like that is that they can be instantly revised when the actual facts prove you wrong. But lets ditch the charts and do a state-by-state analysis of some of the states the McLamiacs think are ready to swoon to the geriatric charms of their cranky candidate.
NH: The Dems have used same day registration with no residency requirement to completely destroy any integrity the system in this last bastion of New England conservatism might have had and now winos and schizophrenics can be lured onto buses in Boston and Hartford and driven across the border to deal with any wave of pro-McLame sentiment among actual NHers.
PA: Famed for its black districts which have a 100% turnout and which vote 100% Democratic this state should be an easy Dem win. Those so-called conservative blue-collar rural whites have lately shown their patriotism by voting for vile pieces of human garbage like Jack Murtha in return for Phat Federal Goodies and The Obamessiah will surely add a few more cars to the gravy train, easy Dem hold.
MI: This state has shown an inexorable will to commit state economic suicide by electing a Dem governor and legislature more rapacious than a pack of hungry vultures and dumber than a bag of hammers. Recent tax increases aimed at raising more revenue caused revenues to tank as the last tremors of life left the private sector. They've elected a Jewish Senator who works every day to help the Jew-killing terrorists (Levin) and just proudly re-elected the stupidest Senator in American history (Stabenow). A state so politically retarded it can only go Democrat!
MN: This northern morass of foetid lakes, clouds of mosquitos, polar temperatures and Scandinavian half-wits has given us some of the most notorious fathead liberals ever to disgrace American politics; Happy Sap Hubert Humphrey, The cringingly dull Walter Mondale; the whining and sniveling friend of Soviet Communism and Saddam Hussien Paul Wellstone, and that cowardly, incoherent disgrace to the Senate and the nation Mark Dayton. Now these Northern Nudniks are outdoing themselves by contemplating putting in the US Senate the most vile, incompetent, repulsive and unfit candidate in the history of democracy, Al Franken.
Their support of the empty-suit liberal Obamessiah should go without saying.
IA: Hooked on ethanol subsidies like a state full of crazed junkies these self-serving and insatiable rural welfare slobs cant risk McLame belatedly realizing that he's a Republican and preventing the government from pouring hundreds of billions into the alternative-energy scam. A sure Dem win.
CO: Formerly sane but now being filled with mansion-building granola-eating elitists and refugees from high-tax states who have brought their Dem voting habits with them like the Giant Flying Taiwanese Cockroaches who hitched a ride on container ships to infest new areas. The Dems also have fertile ground to organize herds of illegal aliens to stuff the ballot boxes of Denver and Boulder. Easy Dem win.
NM:A state described by one Democratic commentator as being one "with tens of thousands of Hispanics yet to be registered." Yup, all they have to do is go across the border with some buses and round'em up. Dem win.
OH: A couple of years ago the Ohioans reacted to the Republican corruption in the state capitol by throwing the bums out and replacing them with a bunch of Democratic bums who preferred stealing from the taxpayers to embezzling from the treasury. A once-mighty state headed for Michiganess. RIP- Dem win.
VA: The Old Dominion is rapidly filling up with tax refugees from nightmare People's Republics like NJ and MD who of course are voting for the same Dems who drove them from their homes in the first place. Jim 'Mellonhead' Webb is an example of the sort of geniuses these people are attracted to. Campaigns to the Right of Reagan and votes in the Senate to the Left of Boxer.The growing and more and more increasingly registered-to-vote illegal alien and felon communities will make a difference here. A Dem win.
As you can see the consultants charts are totally right, with only a few revisions necessary. The democracy and standard of living we formerly knew are about to disappear at the voter-fraud dirty hands of the Party Of Hope! We can become One Big Michigan! Yes We Can!